The master chef

At work:

Colleague - Do you have any experience in cooking?
I - Yes, I cook at home!
(What I think) – I can cook burnt meatballs. And yesterday I made steaks that did not stick together, so it was fried minced meat instead. In addition, it is unbelievable that I have all my fingers left, considering how I handle knives.

Right now I am cooking macaroni with different cooking times in the same saucepan, so that some become overcooked.

And blogs while the water boils over…